Love is blind, especially when a new chapter has just begun. A new romantic relationship is exciting and one hardly notices any flaws in their partner. It is also a phase when some people just like to listen and do not really point out things that bother them. Though problematic behaviour is visible from the beginning, but one may turn blind eye to it, as they do not want to spoil their budding relationship. Relationship experts however say it is not right to suppress your feelings and emotions even at the starting of a new romance and one should try to put their best authentic self forward. Not being honest or expressive in the beginnings could bring trouble later. (Also read: 5 ways to spend quality time with your partner)
“Beginnings are a pivotal time in relationships. Sometimes people don’t show who they are right away, but most often, they do. Be yourself and pay attention to what you’re seeing in budding romantic relationships, friendships, business relationships, etc,” says Nedra Glover Tawwab, Therapist, Author and NYT Bestselling Author, Relationship and Boundaries Expert in her recent Instagram post.
Nedra Glover Tawwab also suggests tips one should follow at the beginning of a relationship in order to make it more successful in long run:
Prioritize self-care: When we get into a new relationship, we often forget to put ourselves first in order to focus on this new relationship that is still in nascent stage. However, it sets the wrong expectation and your partner may take you for granted later as well.
Present yourself authentically: You need not pretend to be somebody else to make a good first impression. If the person really loves you, your good and problematic sides will be equally accepted. By presenting yourself genuinely, you are only conveying to your partner that you are not willing to make unrealistic changes in yourself for sake of a relationship.
Tell people when things bother you: People may not feel open enough to express themselves freely in the beginning or do not convey when they are not okay with certain things. But the beginning of a relationship is the perfect time to set boundaries.
Communicate your expectations: It is never too early to tell them what you want. It will in fact help them understand you better.
Confront issues right away: Instead of putting issues in backburner, it is important to confront at the right time.
Set the tone for how you expect to be treated: If you tolerate bad behaviour early on, chances are that it will continue.
Decide to engage based on who people are instead of their potential.
Express your feelings and emotions: This is important at any or every stage of relationship.